as most of you know, I was serving in the Worship Team as vocalist for quite some times now, one of the veterans actually (old generation if you were to call it). sometimes the Lord speaks during the P&W time, sometimes the Lord brings me to see myself deeper, or even to show me about myself, to remind me something by seeing how others worship Him. sometimes, i was pretty encouraged by brothers and sisters who 'enjoying' their 'worship', how real God is to them when they praise and adore Him, sometimes i can see tears in their eyes as they sing their hearts out to the Lord, as they raised up their hands in surrender and thanksgiving... of coz sometimes i couldnt deny, i got pretty discouraged by those who were busy talking during P&W, busy SMS, busy chewing gums, folding arms as if they were watching a performance. (yes!! i know i shouldnt as i suppose to worship Him too, still i see some are like that, maybe even myself)
Yesterday, while i was 'serving' and worshipping, as usual i saw different people with different attitudes of worship. there was this particular person that i've observed for a long time, the first time *he came for worship services, i can tell *he was really enjoying and worshipping the Lord (of coz who are me to judge, but tat's how i'm interpreting), i used to see *him worship and encouraged by the way *he worship, but recently, as the days go by, it was not like tat anymore, *he was quiet most of the time, *he was not in the 'mood' of worshipping, *he was as if fulfilling his duty to attend church. *he was as if angry with God, or disappointed with Him, and that got me began to wonder..
'Lord, what is wrong?'
is the Music too loud?? the singers were bad???
not *his favourite songs??
is *he tired of the songs we sing??
is it *him? or Him??
where was the Joy of worshipping like before??
i was struggling within me with all these questions.. as i felt that maybe the Lord was saying something... maybe i am seeing myself in *him.
i have to admit, not all the songs we sing every weekends are my favourite songs, some songs are really hard to sing, some songs i felt that we sang too many times. some songs the rythm just doesnt seem right.. yet i sing, bcos i have to. so i began to evaluate myself, asking myself all possible questions.. about my serving.. my worship unto the Lord.. my relationship with the One i worship. as how sad i saw this *brother, that is how sad i see myself.
is worship just a mere 'singing'???
without right music, right singer, right tune, right timing, right energy, right mood... we can't 'worship'?
what then is worship???
the Web defined it as below:
worship is idolize (love unquestioningly and uncritically or to excess; venerate as an idol);
worship is showing devotion to (a deity);
worship is a feeling of profoundlove and admiration;
worship is adoration; surrender;
worship is giving up everything, just to spend time with ONE person.
again, it all depends who we choose to worship. as Christians, we know it is God Himself.
therefore all our devotions, our focus, our time, our love is to be on God and Him alone, there is no one else, nothing else. it is beyond our pleasure, beyond our conveniences, beyond everything. disregards on how bad the musicians are, how bad the singers are.. focus point?! - the One above.
i believe God has once again reminded me, and shouting it out to me 'Yea!! that what I mean!!' it is just the 'human' me taking all excuses not to focus on Him. forgive me Lord.
yes i have to agree, it is not easy, when something went wrong.. but that 'something' should not deprive us from worshipping. there should not be any other 'excuses' anymore for not worshipping the Lord.
next time, my friend, either you are a musician in the church, or a sound engineer, or a projectionist, a preacher, or anyone who are busy 'doing work' while the Worship Service is going on. take a time to look at yourself.. checking yourself..
are you worshipping?? are you adoring?? are you focusing?
let me introduce to you another Meal that i cherish a lot
this meal is none other than .....
this..
a loaf of bread and a can of Curry Ayam Cap Yeos.. hahhaah
thank God for microwave... i have it warm and yummy
i had a lovely lunch today.. thanks for peggie too who reminded me this Meal..
this is actually my childhood meal.. i remembered vividly sharing this with an old pakcik who used to tumpang my dad's inn (he used to run an inn, and we stayed). in fact not i shared with him.. he shared it with me.. this old man (couldnt really remember his face), every day, almost everyday, would take a small can of curry chicken and soak it into a hot water (to warm it), then opened it and dip it with uncut bread.. whenever i was near him, he would share a piece with me. ohh... God bless his heart.. :) and i really enjoyed it..
today, as peggie told me that was her breakfast, i was liked 'ting!!'..i'm goin to have it for lunch.. i went back home, went to the bakery downstairs and bought a loaf of uncut bread (normaly they have between 11.30am to 12.30pm - as the bread are still warm, they couldnt cut it), bought a can of curry chicken.. went home, microwaved the curry.. cut the bread and dip it in for my lunch..
that sweet memories...
that i cherish...
thank you Lord..
*wink wink*
p/s... please make sure your bread is not sliced.. lagi best..!!! kaka
wow.. i have not been really checking on my blog tis week..coz pretty busy.. then... today i found out.. my blog's visitors has exceeding the number 6000.. where i've not acknowledged and give thanks to God and the readers..
To all the mothers out there... [specially to my dear Mama :)]
Thank You for giving all you have to me Thank you for loving me as I am Thank you for your love and prayers Thank you for all the sacrifices you've made I love you mama.
May your days be rich and abundance with His everflowing love, joy, peace, kindness and blessings. May His blessings follow you all the days of your life. May you never be in want. May He always be your guide and tower of strength. Amen
the Overcomers are anticipating the National Bible Knowledge Postal Quiz 2009, organised by the Scripture Union. and we did it in Hosanna Hall, cause the Jkids need the church for presentation practise.
still.. i thank God for the great turnout.. thou some of them did not study, or read, they still turned up. and i'm encouraged.. Thank You Overcomers!!
siapa fail kena belanja McDonalds.. kaka.
diligently...
not for adrian.. who was doing strecthing instead of answering the questions. hahaha
very carefully... natalie not strecthing..but scratching her head.. keke
to the birthday girl.. Happy Blessed Birthday my Dear.. ;) keke..
loving God..
loving people.. specially da Youthzz..
not forgeting Jagung(sweet corn)too..
working for God..
working for the people..specially da Youthzz..
Wanderer..
Thinker..
Wonderer..
DayDreamer..
thoughts
totz of wat I wish for my Blog..
be A place ..
* to give Glory to God;
* to know me MORE
* to learn wat i've gone thru
* for encouragementz & funz
* for precious momentz
* to inspire others
* to express myself, my inner totz
... and you tell me..
desire
"One thing I ask of the LORD, this is what I seek; that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to seek HIm in His temple." ~ Psalm 27:4